Co-parenting on holidays and special occasions

Co-parenting during the holidays and special occasions takes extra effort and communication in order to ensure a child has a pleasant and harmonious experience. From birthdays to Christmas, special occasions and holidays are an important part of life. But, celebrating big occasions when families are severed due to divorce or family separation can be especially challenging.

 

Tips for Co-parenting During the Holidays and Other Special Occasions

Going from celebrating the holidays and special occasions as a complete family unit to instead having two households celebrating separately may seem daunting. But, by discussing, planning, and following these guidelines, parents can ensure their child’s holidays and special occasions will be cherished nonetheless:

1. Effective communication between the two households is key. Before the holidays or special occasions, parents should anticipate and discuss the celebration beforehand.Discussing each household’s expectations, ideas, and plans for the holidays not only gives parents the chance to come up with the best plan for their child, but also builds trust and a foundation for the process.
2. Keeping traditions alive is important for both parents and the child. Special family customs and traditions are a highlight of holiday celebration and can be maintained regardless of divorced households.By carrying on these traditions, parents can emphasize that no matter the circumstances, the child can still enjoy the holiday and feel “normal”.
3. Divide the holiday/celebration amongst the two households. Parents don’t have to split the holiday in half, but it could be beneficial for both homes to take turns year by year.Every home should have a special holiday tradition; this helps ensure the child doesn’t feel like they’re missing out on something at either home.
4. Incorporate travel into the celebration. Traveling can be time consuming and expensive, but it doesn't have to be. If parents are willing, traveling between households for the holiday/special occasion could be beneficial. A family vacation also may help boost spirits, encourage communication between all members, and give the family an opportunity to spend time together. There are several holiday visitation schedule options.
5. If travel is not an option, video chat or phone calls can be a great way for the child to stay in contact with the non-custodial parent during these special days. In addition, if transportation is a challenge between the two households, parents may consider setting up drop offs/pick ups at shared locations or meeting at a middle ground.
6. It’s important to make sure the child understands they’re loved, will be taken care of, and that they’re still a family. At the end of the day, putting the child’s needs first should always be top priority. Depending on the age and understanding level of the child, speaking to them honestly and keeping them in the loop of everything going on can help them comprehend the new situation better.

Ultimately, co-parenting during the holidays and special occasions is possible. By having a plan and open communication, both households can come together and give their child a happy, memorable, and positive experience.

Important Considerations for Co-parenting During Holidays and Special Occasions

In addition to open communication and vacation ideas, co-parenting during holidays and special occasions means considering some important factors both parents should think about:

• Maintain a Parent-child relationship: Despite being separated, it’s important for both households to ensure the parental relationship between the parent and child endures. This can be done by planning regular visits, scheduling phone calls or video chats, supporting activities and hobbies, and staying trusting and honest.
• Finances: All parties often need to consider their financial situation during the holidays and special occasions. This can include extra child support, holiday presents, travel, and other expenses.
• Be mindful of partner preferences: If one parent has a new partner, it’s important to include them in the celebration appropriately. Be willing to embrace and accept new traditions, even if it’s cheating the other parent out of time with their child.

Conclusion

Although co-parenting during the holidays and special occasions may seem stranger than celebrating these occasions as one family, it is important to remain positive and look for effective solutions to create long and meaningful memories for the children. With effective communication, strong family traditions, and putting the child’s needs first, parents can ensure their child can continue to have special experiences during the holidays and other special occasions.

Warning:  This post is neither financial, health, legal, or personal advice nor a substitute for the advice offered by a professional. These are serious matters, and the help of a professional is recommended as it can impact your future.